I Might Have Been

Help me! Help!
I'm stuck I am so stuck!
Black inertia has been the bane
- it has been THE enemy -
and stronger thus far.
I do not have it in me
to fight.

No - I am not possessed
of strength or faith -
of patience or TRUST
to know that I am safe
on the other side of chance.
I cannot see the ground
as I am on it.

Lost in a tunnel and dizzy as to front or back -
start or finish -
even the a/b decisions are tortuously -torturously!- impossible
And as I see the bullet heading squarely and surely
for my soul's and sentience's middle
I can neither move left nor right
I cannot choose, faced with "maybe" or "might".

This has been the longest night
and I am done!
The villian has won...
...I cannot be found,
for my past and present and all I ever had or was
has wed me forever to this ground
as I am in it.